The Unit Breed – Always Distance the Lonely
I get it, I get it. God, Unit Breed, stop going on at me, you’re preaching to the converted. I like Sonic Youth, honest. Yes, and Mercury Rev. Well... before the shrill fellow took vocal responsibility. And yes (YES, jesus), I like Yo La Tengo and the Flaming Lips. Can I go now? No? You want me to listen to the rest of your album? Well, how many tracks is it?
TEN? Oh, do I ‘ave to?
All right, go on then.
Yep, Operator and Machine, sounds like Yo La Tengo covering Talking Heads (no, but really, is this off More Songs about Buildings and Food, because, if it’s not, someone better get ready for a cast iron court case). Right, next. Believe, wasn’t this once called Rhinoceros and appeared on the Smashing Pumpkins debut? Are you sure? Okay, okay, just asking, jeez. No, you’re right, coz’ that song was a bit catchy and built up to a crescendo, didn’t it. Silly me.
God, this is boring. Is it nearly finished, only if I stare at my navel any longer I may wear away my epidermis leading to a chunk of larger intestine to splay out on to the floor. This is only track five? Fine, if you want me, I’ll be attempting to self-suffocate.
Hold on... Hang on... and wait on. What’s this Unit Breed? This is SUPERB. It sounds like a cover of... oh, it is a cover of Lee Hazelwood’s Sand. That’s quite ironic, isn’t it. Because, like, the rest of your, snort, album sounds like covers, guffaw, yet it’s only when doing a, giggle, cover that you sound any good, titter-titter.
And while I’m being very clever and pity and ironic, how about this one... Sand? Bland, more like.